Church Like Family

     “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.” — John 13:34

     Church should feel like a family, right? When I spoke with a man who hadn’t found a place of worship, he told me that no church he’d visited felt like family. I asked more, and he explained how coming to a new church can feel intimidating. You walk in, no one looks your way, or you’re treated like an outsider. An exclusiveness between the church and its people can make us feel separated from the church and, therefore, separated from God. “Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever” — 1 Timothy 5:8. God is our Father, and we are His children. We are a family in Christ and our churches should reflect that.

     In a blood family, we are human, we aren’t perfect, we make mistakes, and we are messy. Blood families can be so beautiful, but also painful. While God is our Father, some may hear that and feel fear; what they know as a father is frightening, full of pain, or absent. “Behold, how good and pleasant it is when brothers dwell in unity!” — Psalm 133:1. You’ve probably heard of Found Family before: a family not related by blood, but together by love and shared values. Now, a church family is not like a family of blood relatives. In church, we are different, unrelated by heritage and traditions, backgrounds and history, but united in our faith. 

     How can a church show that we are family? We can’t just say it, because then it sounds cult-ish; We have to show it like Jesus shows His love to us.

   1. Jesus loves everyone. He spoke to Gentiles, who were treated as unclean and unworthy; Jesus’ longest conversation in the Bible is with a Samaritan woman who had five husbands, not the typical person you’d expect the Savior to spend time with. He valued women, gave them a place in His ministry, and tasked two women with His most important message of being raised from the dead. He loves the children and spent His limited time with them even when His generation believed childhood was insignificant. Jesus ate at the table with sinners and tax collectors, and none of His disciples were perfect. God has used imperfect people for His perfect plan.

“Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.” — Hebrews 13:2. 

     A church can be like a family in loving everyone who walks through its doors and those who don’t. God made us in His perfect image, and we can show this by treating every living being with respect and forgiveness. Instead of being exclusive with its members, a church should celebrate diversity. By this, I don’t mean pushing ideas into heads or changing the ways of the Bible, but acknowledging the beauty in our differences and how each of us has a gift to bring to this world. Encourage those who don’t look or think like you to church, and make them feel valued by inviting them to small groups or investing in gifting them a Bible. 

   2. Jesus heals us. There are countless stories of Jesus healing disease, hurt, disability, and hurt inside. Now, we aren’t Jesus and can’t just cure the problems of every person who walks through our doors, but we can ask Him to. Provide a prayer team before and after services. A friendly and kind team full of confident speakers, comfortable praying for others. With this team, attendees can ask for help praying to God for their problems. If a fellow Christian doesn’t know what to pray for in a time of confusion and hurt, encourage them to ask the Holy Spirit to pray for them. Knowing that you have someone praying for you and God fighting your battles can be a relief to those suffering.

“Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.”  — Romans 8:26. 

     Some people may feel uncomfortable asking for help with prayer in person. For this, I would suggest a prayer request on your church’s website or a prayer wall where people can write their prayer requests. Leave the prayers public so you and your church can pray over them and let God do the rest.

   3. Jesus forgives us and helps us grow. Forgiveness is like breathing: to take in God’s forgiveness, we must release grudges and give it to others. Jesus told His disciples to forgive a person 77 times, but His point was to stop counting one’s mistakes and always give forgiveness when one asks. When a person in your church is suffering from sin and asks for forgiveness, give it to them as God gave it to you and help them to overcome it through prayer and Christian counseling.

“Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.”

— Galatians 6:2.

     God accepts us as we are in the church but works to help us leave changed. As a family, we should bear each other's burdens like the cross He bore for us. We can do this by offering support by reaching out to those we know are hurting. We can create small groups centered around the problems we are trying to overcome, such as divorce, incarcerated family, mental health, and addiction. Provide contact to Christian counseling and other support services, and create a community in the church built on Jesus and love. Encourage your members to be someone we can lean on, and let them know that we will be there for them when they need someone to lean on, too.

“This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.”

— Psalm 118:24. 

     When we see church as a family, we feel comfortable asking for help and growing in our faith with our community. This can revolutionize the way people view churches. As Christians, let us make an effort to treat children of God as brothers and sisters, support one another, and show people the love of Jesus.

     For more resources, check these articles out:

 -Four ways the church is like a big family, NewSpring Church, by Jason Farr.

-31 Bible Verses About Church Family, Christianity Path, by Emily Rogers.

-Your Church Is Your Family, TGC, by Megan Hill.

-Why Does God Want His Church To Be A Family, Discipleship, by Jim Putman.

-The Church as a Family, Redeem City, by Aaron Dailey